Real vs Perfect

Friday, October 07, 2011

** I want to say that is post was in NO way meant to jab or put down the plus models and especially Plus Model Magazine. It was a personal note on my internal battle with being perfect or being the real me. It is clear the word real was taken out of context in the way I meant it, and I just want to apologize to anyone who felt I was putting them down. I 100% believe any woman, model or not is real. And, i have edited this post to accurately reflect what I was trying to say.**

I've been wrestling with the idea of real versus perfect for a while. By real, I mean the true me, the me that doesn't lie about my size, age or business. The me that isn't afraid to be just me. The perfect me tries to take over once in a while, and say, well we can take the 20 off 320, right? *lol* The real me would say, I am a size 22/24 on top, 26/28 on bottom, 5'8", 320 lb woman who isn't perfect and probably should re-read my blog posts to ensure I said what I meant to. :(

The other day, Skorch Editor-In-Chief, Cali Lee, posted a link to the most beautiful and real article I've read in a while. The author perfectly brought into sharp focus how skewed our priorities are some days in his blog post The disease called “Perfection”.  From his post, I completely related to...


“Perfection” is a mom hating herself because she only sees that every other mom around her is the perfect mother, the perfect wife, and the perfect neighbor. I’d give anything to be Mrs. Jones. Today she ran 34 miles, cooked six complete meals, participated in a two-hour activity with each of her seven children, hosted a marriage class with her husband, and still had time to show up for Bunco. What this mom doesn’t know is that Mrs. Jones is also at home crying right now because the pressure to be “Perfect” never lets up."

I said on twitter the other "I don't live for fashion, I live to use fashion as a platform to empower the women who struggle to love their bodies." I think some might say that empowering women to love their bodies is as important as encouraging regular pedi's, but I know, from my own experience, that the amount of power that comes from natural confidence significantly can alter your life.

I know this because I have lived in both sides of the confidence spectrum, and in the end, I know that I feel more empowered when I see women I can relate to being fierce, confident, successful and making their dreams happen. That positive energy is undeniable and positively infectious and I am so proud of the thousands of women who are representing the majority of plus size women for the Full Body Photo Project.

I know I've probably bombarded your facebook and twitter feeds, but I never expected the support from so many companies, bloggers and plus advocates. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for representing and showing women all over the world how beautiful we all are.

I will always love my body and try to take care of it with exercise and good nutrition. But, since I'm not perfect, I will fail, but I will never give up.




This is one of my favorite shots.
Showing off my new self made scarf :)


Scarf - Made by Me
Jacket - Alloy.com
Flower Pin - Lane Bryant
Purse - Gifted by Torrid
Sunnies & Shoes - Target

Pictures by self - courtesy of a tripod and remote :)


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About Me

STATS Which are important so you can gauge if these outfits will look similar on your body.
SIZES: Size 24 on top, Size 26/28 on bottom, 11W Shoes
I have been every size from 12 to 32 in last 12 years.
MEASUREMENTS: 5'8", 50" Bust, 48" High Waist, 60" Hips

HEALTH: (since it's an inevitable conversation, here are the facts) 310lbs as of Jan 2014, normal blood pressure + cholesterol + sugars + etc, no PCOS, no thyroid problems, I think my metabolism has completely left the building however, I absolutely believe the human body was meant to move and exercise is important! Get those endorphins baby! Afterall, happy people don't kill people, right? :D

RULES I LIVE BY
• being a working mommy wifey doesn't mean I have to dress the part *wink*
• black, white, red and grey for life
• no matter what size I am I will dress this body to the nines
• Size and age are just a numbers

For more plus size inspiration and body posi loving, check out my magazine SKORCH lead by Tiffany Kaelin Knight!





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